Being a main character in this poorly-written sci fi-drama… that resembles an unending nightmare… forget surreal — this feels like perpetual death. In digital slo-mo… where you get to see each and every pixel in each frame, as it progresses at a speed that makes it feel like the speed of light in reverse. Who has upturned my universe? Why?
Far too often, I find myself grieving for my hero… the man who lived his life zestfully… and believed that life was to be enjoyed. Just as zestfully as he pursued his desires, he passionately rails against the killer that he does not know exists. Even in that, despite Al’s efforts to make me relinquish my love for Dad, he is still my hero in this war. Yes, he has his quirks, too — no saint — he is human, just like the rest of us. But, for me, he has always been a hero, of sorts — even if I didn’t agree with him, his contradictions, or like his methods.
He loved me unconditionally, while putting forth numerous conditions that were sometimes hard to live up to — but, in striving for victory in these challenges, I gained a better understanding of myself, and grew to achieve new heights, both personally and professionally. He was the motivation for my personal success, and the heights I achieved were just as much for him as they were for me.
What do I do without him?
Death is a part of life… I know. As soon as we are born, we are on the path to death. Given. But, somewhere in the fiber of my being is the unrealistic desire to never have to experience this life without the two people who brought me here.
I guess it’s time to grow up.
Dad's Pal Al... 